Our Own Personal "Hotel Rwanda"

On January 29, 2008 Paul Rusesabagina was BYU's forum speaker. Rusesabagina --often referred to as the Oskar Schindler of Africa--is the former general manager of the Mille Collines Hotel Rwanda which was made famous in the movie Hotel Rwanda. For 70 days in 1994 Rusesabagina sheltered refugees in this hotel saving the lives of 1200 people.

It is important to remember that these 1200 people were from a different ethnic group than Rusesabagina--people who were being called "cockroaches." Yet Rusesabagina was willing to be called a traitor and to risk losing his own life for them by standing against the prejudice and senseless violence. He felt that it wasn't the majority of people who hated each other so much as it was poor leadership that took advantage of differences in order to divide and conquer.

In his message at BYU he taught the importance of the following that he learned from his own experience:

• Dialogue: "The only thing that can bring people together is dialogue." "Instead of fighting violence and war with more violence, people should strive to increase dialogue." "Words can be the best weapon or the worst weapon in the human being's arsenal." "Whoever opens his or her mouth and is willing to discuss with you, you will always come up with an agreement. You will always come up with a compromise depending on how you deal with the situation." "As long as people don't consider each other, they will never get anywhere. As long as people are fighting for power...they will never get anywhere." Use verbal skills instead of resorting to violence.
• Hope: Never give up on hope.
• Stand up: "Stand up and do whatever you can to save the situation of the world." "Don't stand by. You can do something." "We should be aware of the problems and find our own solutions."

Rusesabagina entitled his presentation "Hotel Rwanda: A story yet to be told" because the story isn't over yet. Each of us can do our small part in making it a better story than it otherwise would be--not only for Rwanda but for our own corner of the world as well. As Rusesabagina says, "Whenever we think this is the end, I tell you, it is never the end. God always has a way to save his people."

Serendipity Strikes Again

Another serendipitous experience has touched my life. While in the midst of organizing a group that is going to be educating and advocating for change in regards to Hispanic learners, I received an email from Kevin Eikenberry, the author of Remarkable Leadership, who was conducting a conference call on change.

I had the opportunity to participate in that call yesterday with Kevin. The insights he offered truly are remarkable, and they couldn't have come at a more opportune time.

Kevin strongly recommended that we share with a colleague what we learned --and the sooner the better--as that will help cement the ideas. Stephen Covey has offered the same advice. I felt my "blog" may be the best place to share and record what I learned.

Below are some of the points I learned and want to apply:

• If there is no need for change, there is no need for a leader
• Not everyone will be at the same place concerning change, and it's important to be ok with this
• People view change differently, attaching negative, positive, and/neutral emotions to it
• Be a proponent (not an "evangelist") for the change by emphasizing the positive benefits/rewards of the change and minimizing the risks
• People don't resist change as much as they resist being changed
• Acknowledge where people are in regards to the present state as they have been doing what they are doing for a long time
• Build a post-change vision that can be experienced with all the senses
• When talking about change, the conversation and dialogue need to be continually open and ongoing
• "Sell" individuals, not groups --by getting individuals engaged and involved will help build the momentum
• Call the change a journey (a process)
• Ask questions! Ask questions! Ask questions!
• Find language for the change that is not just a hollow slogan

Participating with Kevin in this learning conference call convinced me to personally commit to move from focusing on resistance, opposition, obstacles in relationship to change and focus on exciting, challenge, opportunity instead.

NOTE: For more information about Kevin Eikenberry and his work, including articles that can be downloaded, visit http://www.kevineikenberry.com/

Willing to Dialogue With Those With Whom We Disagree

The work of my good friend, Izzy Kalman, the author of Bullies to Buddies, has done it once again!

I was disturbed by a conversation I had yesterday with a friend. This friend had just been involved in a very hot debate in Utah over vouchers. He shared with me that when he had reached out, more that once, to dialogue with those who had not only attacked his ideas because of their opposing views, but also had attacked his character, his offer to dialogue was either rejected or ignored.

This disturbed me greatly for various reasons, one being that if we as adults can't be role models on how to dialogue with those who disagree with us, how can we expect our young people to learn how to deal with conflict in a civil manner? Looking for answers I went to Izzy's website--www.bullies2buddies.org-- for some counsel. I wasn't disappointed.

At Izzy's website there was a link to another website--www.freedomforum.org. At this site I found "A Statement of Principles" called Religious Liberty, Public Education, and the Future of American Democracy. Although there are seven principles all of which are excellent, there was one, the 7th that particularly fit this situation with my friend.

The 7th principle: CONDUCT OF PUBLIC DISPUTES
Civil debate, the cornerstone of a true democracy, is vital to the success of any effort to improve and reform America's public schools.
Personal attacks, name-calling, ridicule, and similar tactics destroy the fabric of our society and undermine the educational mission of our schools.....Through constructive dialogue we have much to learn from one another.

There are still some lingering questions I am facing this morning: How can we have this happen--especially when efforts to dialogue are rejected and/or ignored? Where do we start?

It could very well be that the answers to these questions lie within the principles of spiritual leadership.

Status Quo Is Not An Option

Until people realize that status quo is not an option, business will continue as usual. Business as usual is unacceptable if we are to better serve our diverse learners in our education system.


One of the reasons that status quo persists is because when a proposal is presented, people tend to focus on its flaws and reject it because it is imperfect. Then a debate ensues, those for and those against. No one really wins, especially our diverse learners, when this happens. A debate is divisive.


A better option, in my opinion, would be to understand that there is a "THIRD SPACE." In other words, there is a better answer than a for or against a proposal. To find that better answer, though, at least two things must happen: 1) An understanding that status quo is not an option, 2) A healthy dialogue where all ideas can be freely expressed and explored.