Listening to and Learning from Rhett Laubach

Once again Kevin Eikenberry has enriched my life! This last Thursday his company hosted a 60 minute guest conversation call with Rhett Laubach. The conversation call was entitled Listening Like A Leader.

In this call and on his "blog" Laubach suggested that the development of the following habits would help us become better listeners:

1. Provide value: We can do this by responding to the other person by saying things such as, "I agree 100%" or "Yes" or "Here's how we could maybe build on that." It also means suggesting a book or a person that might be helpful.
2. Change things for the better: While listening be aware of gaps that your expertise can help fill.
3. Serving others: Stop what you are doing and give the other person your full attention.
4. Make the most of every interaction: Start your conversations with others as if you were already in the middle of a conversation with them by asking questions and responding to the answers with more questions so they are comfortable sharing their life stories.
5. Knowing they don't know everything: Give someone else the opportunity to share his/her expertise.
6. Being available to others: Put yourself in situations, seek out situations, encourage situations and fully commit to situations where you give of your time to someone who needs or wants a listening ear.

Thanks to Rhett for helping us know where to go once we have learned the eye contact listening principle.

Note: Contact info for Rhett

Work: 405.216.5050 Mobile: 405.517.7385 Fax: 810.454.7556 rhett@yournextspeaker.com http://authenticityrules.blogspot.com/ http://pliblog.yournextspeaker.com/

Both Scholarly and Religious: Dallin H. Oaks

Dallin H. Oaks served as the President of BYU (Brigham Young University) from 1971-1980. From 1980 to 1984 he served as a Utah Supreme Court Justice and was closely considered by the Reagan administration in 1981 to be a nominee for the Supreme Court Justice. On April 7, 1984 Oaks was sustained as a member of the Quorum of the Twelve of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints which is a life long calling.


Obviously Dallin H. Oaks is not only a well-educated and scholarly man of high distinction, but he is also a deeply religious man as well. Therefore, when he speaks, I listen knowing his words convey an extremely important message that I need to apply to my life.


Yesterday as I read his LDS (Latter Day Saint) Conference talk Good, Better, Best given at the October 2007 Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints Conference, I thought of its application to how we serve our diverse learners.

At the beginning of his talk he reminds us that just because something is good is not a sufficient reason to do it. He goes onto say that there are so many good things to do in this world there isn't enough time to do them all. We must give priority to the best of the good.

Elder Oaks tells of when he was a youngster how they used the Sears and Roebuck catalog as we use malls and the internet today. In the catalog there were three quality categories for shoes--good, better, and best--with a cost increase as the quality increased. He compared this to choices we have in life. Even though something may cost more (in time, energy, or money), the added cost may be well worth it because of the added value it brings.

This counsel relates to our service to diverse learners in a variety of ways:

First, there are now thousands of people who give speeches, write books, and make videos about what we need to do better serve our diverse learners. The majority of them are good, but we don't have time to respond to them all. We must choose the best from the good. I would define the best as those who are focused on what works either because research and/or experience support their claim.

Second, we must think not only of the good things we can for our diverse learners, but rather the best things. For instance, a good thing is for all educators (teachers and leaders) to become ESL endorsed. A better thing would be to apply what is learned. The best thing would be to make sure that the lives of the students are changed and improved because of the efforts. In other words, rejoicing just because more educators are ESL endorsed is not sufficient.

We move from good to best when our desire to serve our diverse learners is founded in love rather than out of duty or arrogance.

"The Drum Major Instinct" Speech by Martin Luther King

Last Friday I had the opportunity to attend the 2008 Drum Major Awards Luncheon in Salt Lake. The keynote speaker was Judge Shauna Graves-Robertson. She chose to base her speech on the "The Drum Major Instinct" speech that Martin Luther King, Jr. gave at the Ebenezer Baptist Church in Atlanta, Georgia on February 4, 1968.

I as so impressed with her speech that I came home and found Dr. King's speech so I could read it in it's entirety. In honor of Martin Luther King's life that is celebrated today, I am choosing to share lessons from this speech that if applied, can help King's dream be realized.

The speech is based on the story found in the 10th chapter of St. Mark in the New Testament when James and John, the sons of Zebedee, request to sit at his right hand and left hand. Toward the end of Jesus' response, He says, "But so shall it not be among you, but whosoever will be great among, shall be your servant: and whosoever of you will be the chiefest, shall be the servant of all."

King cautions us not to be too critical of James and John because deep down all of us have this instinct=="it's a kind of drum major instinct--a desire to be out front, a desire to lead the parade, a desire to be first." He adds that even when we do something good, too often we do it so we can be praised for it.

King notes some ways that this drum major instinct manifests itself in our lives:

• Being a "joiner" for attention, recognition, importance
• Being taken in by advertisers who promise that their product will make us stand out
• Living above our means in order to outdo the Joneses
• Boasting
• Striving to identify with the so-called big-name people
• Engaging in activities merely to get attention which if not harnessed can lead to anti social behavior in the quest for recognition
• Pushing others down through gossip and even lies in hopes to push oneself up
• Snobbish exclusiveness and classism which can even happen in churches, the one place where everybody should be the same regardless of degrees, titles, economics, etc. because all are children of the same Father
• Race prejudice because of desire to feel superior

Jesus did not condemn James and John because of their desire. In fact, in essence he told them that the drum major instinct was a good thing if they used it right. In other words, it's ok to want to be first, but want to be first in love, excellence, generosity---a definition for greatness.

King emphasizes that the use of this definition of greatness, everyone can be great because everyone can serve. The one solitary life of Jesus is our example--He who had no credentials but himself just went around serving and doing good.

Cornell West Insights--Part 3

"A democracy is created to ensure that arbitrary forms of power are not deployed or used against fellow citizens and fellow human beings." "Democracy is affirming the humanity an dignity of people of color."

"I am not a politician. I am a fellow citizen but I am deeply political."

West reminds us of what Malcolm X suggested about the fact that the chickens will come home to roost. "We must not think that there will ever be enough police or prisons to deal with the overwhelming social despair that results from the social neglect in those kindergartens, elementary schools, and secondary schools and high schools.

"Resources are necessary for education, but not sufficient for essential education. "Creative thinking, critical intelligence, deep commitment, connection with students, believing deeply that students can learn are other critical essentials." Yet, when 1% of the population has roughly the same wealth as the bottom 95% of the population, there needs to be a serious discussion about the wealth inequality in this country.

"Charity is not justice."

"I am not optimistic. Anyone who has the audacity to adopt a democratic vision cannot be optimistic, though I do not conflate optimism with hope." Hope means one keeps keeping on to come together to form communities and schools that embody democratic principles.

"Maybe we have a problem. Maybe we ought to really try to take seriously multiracial democracy. Which we know was not the division of the founding fathers, even given their relative wisdom. They could not conceive of black, white, red, yellow, all having equal citizenship status. They could not conceive of women having equal citizenship status. And one says that not to trash them just contextualize them. They had wisdom but it is relative to context, just as we have wisdom today but it is relative to our context. But we are building on their vision...if we do not wrestle...with [its] overwhelming inequality and increasing inequality, then yes, we can begin to lose that precious democratic tradition that was transmitted, bequeathed to us by the best of those who came before."

West reminds us of a staple from the Martin Luther King legacy which was to let go of bitterness, hatred and revenge, regardless of history. We must fall in love with peace and justice and the desire to serve.